ScottyLee - You sir are very perceptive. Way back when, he was new to duck hunting and wouldn't spend the "big money" on waders, so he bought hip boots 'cause they were cheaper. He was new to this right?, O.K., we're all new at one time. So when we pulled up to the unloading spot at the public hunting place, we were about to go on a mile march accompanied by a long beaver dam balance beam finale. We pile outta the truck, everybody grabs stuff and is ready to go. Homeboy is futzing around in the dark, "c'mon and hurry up" "yeah, yeah, yeah", "alright already let's go man waddya doing?". Finally he gets it together and is lagging behind on the march. A 1/2mile later we start the beaver dam slog so he starts worrying about getting wet. I tell him to snap the hip boot straps to his belt. But he's still struggling, falling behind, cussing, sweating like a beast etc. The other two in the crew are way ahead but I'm staying close to my homeboy trying to help.
I turn on my light to sort it all out and he has the hip boot straps going across his nutsack. I'm thinking defective chinese hip boots, weird but keep slogging. He stops again "Man how much further this is killing me" I make a second inspection and WTF??????.............. In the parking lot hurry up rush he put the hip boots on the wrong feet!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

JEEZUS CHRISTOPHER, he's been hiking and sloshing all this time with the boots on the wrong feet. There is no dry ground anywhere in this quagmire, but we're almost there, just keep walking dumbazz.
You can't make this stuff up.
No kidding, this year one of my crew said to please get him going just for the entertainment value alone.
Them ducks is wary. We now resume our regularly scheduled forum melee in progress.