DuckSouth.com

goosebruce wrote:We duck hunt an hour from the house. Im lucky that way. so we get up and drive everyday, and then come home. Im gone so much during dog season, I actually think I owe it to her to not be in a gig I got to stay for 2 nights and 3 days everyweekend. travis

As I read your post I was thinking...this dude is the king of his castle...than you told me your home every night during duck season....mine wouldn't bitch QUITE AS MUCH if that was the case for me either.

I think it's a bell curve of bitching...i.e. you start out dating and they are just the coolest thing since sliced bread...as time wears on and they sink their claws deeper and deeper the bitching ensues...and really takes off after marriage...than peaks after kids...once the kids are old enough to go as well, they're begging both of you to go...

Sounds to me some folks need to remember what a relationship is about. Its a GIVE and TAKE.. Take care of your problems with your girls, not on an internet chat board. If it still doesn't work out after a long chat between you two, end the relationship or change your priorities. keep it simple fellas.

yeah I do things during the year that I wouldn't normally want to do but if its important to her then its important to me. She is the same way. She doesn't want to go to the bass pro shop every time we go to Memphis but I just walked through a mall for 2 hours letting her enjoy herself. Its all give and take.

Trying to say "how its gonna be" from the beginning is complete disrespect to her and is probably the beginning to many unhappy wives and divorces.

Theres my $.02

Deltacottonboy12 wrote:Sounds to me some folks need to remember what a relationship is about. Its a GIVE and TAKE.. Take care of your problems with your girls, not on an internet chat board. If it still doesn't work out after a long chat between you two, end the relationship or change your priorities. keep it simple fellas.

yeah I do things during the year that I wouldn't normally want to do but if its important to her then its important to me. She is the same way. She doesn't want to go to the bass pro shop every time we go to Memphis but I just walked through a mall for 2 hours letting her enjoy herself. Its all give and take.

Trying to say "how its gonna be" from the beginning is complete disrespect to her and is probably the beginning to many unhappy wives and divorces.

Theres my $.02

Good post...esp good for a guy that isn't married yet. No one would like to be in a "how its gonna be situation".

i don't think its trying to say, this is how its going to be... I think its being honest about how its going to be. Im going to go, and any woman that has ever loved me got used to that, or was gone when I got back. Its part of me, always has been, always will be. i remember a date I had, we where engauged, and she decided she was going to keep me home one weekend during duck season (I was maybe 20 and she was 18 at the time). When i got up and left to go hunting, she went into my moms room and started crying to her. My mom told her right then and there, I was like my dad, and all you where gonna do was make yourself miserable if you're upset when they're gone.. make the most of when they are there. We ended up growing apart over other things, and I ended up marrying my fishing buddies ex wife ( cause I knew how she was about me being gone, no secret how she'd take it).

I work 4 days one week, 5 the next, and 6 the next. On my 4 day week, most of the time I leave on thursday night, and come back on sat night to dog train somewhere. My wife would rather me be off and catch up on some sleep than spend 10 hours driving, even if that means Im gone 1 or 2 nights. Then on sunday morning when I get back home, Im fun on sunday afternoon instead of a peepee cause Im exhausted.

if I need to be gone during duck season, i go. She understands. But most of the time if someone has ducks, we have ducks, and I can kill as many an hour from the house as 4 hours from the house.

I used to fish. In fact, we built a house on a street called BASSFIELD and live on a lake. Id take my bass boat with me to work, and fish 3 or 4 afternoons a week after work. On weekends I was gone, had fishing liscenes to 4 states and fished tournments all over the place. One day my wife came home and I was fishing in the backyard. It pissed her off... she said your gone 250 days a year fishing, why do I have to come home and SEE it. I never fished in the backyard again. Seemed fair to me. I could be gone to the river fishing till 10 oclock, and come home to a plate of food and a smooch with never a word. But she didnt want to SEE me fish in the backyard. I was home, i ought to be with her. Went years without wetting a hook in the back yard, even when the boys fished I usually just sat with them.

Im an obseessive person. I dont barely do anything. Im as crazy about my wife as I am about my dogs and my duck hunting. Thats the key that makes 'US' work. Is it the right formula for everyone? Probably not. When she hints, I take the nod. She doesnt hint much, and my whole family is impressed with ANYTIME or ANYTHING I do, because they know my schedual and how many demands are on my time (both work, dog work, and self imposed). travis

woody wrote:So why is it that every year about this time, and I'm sure I'm not the only one that gets it, I have to get a lecture from the girl I'm dating about hunting season and why I have to be gone on most weekends? My argument is that women have the rest of the year to drag me to events, weddings, "get togethers" with friends, etc., all I'm asking for is 3-4 months out of the year, which breaks down to about 12-16 weekends. She can have the rest. The girls I date know I hunt, but yet they still seem to want to nag me about going all the time.
Does it get any better? Is there an end to these arguments in my near future? Where can I find a girl that understands getting 66% of the year and me only asking for 33% is a better deal for her?

Dat s&it aint dat good.

All I can tell everyone is to figure out some way to work it out. If you aren't there for her, another fine gentlemen will be more than happy to take up your slack.

goosebruce wrote:i don't think its trying to say, this is how its going to be... I think its being honest about how its going to be. Im going to go, and any woman that has ever loved me got used to that, or was gone when I got back. Its part of me, always has been, always will be. i remember a date I had, we where engauged, and she decided she was going to keep me home one weekend during duck season (I was maybe 20 and she was 18 at the time). When i got up and left to go hunting, she went into my moms room and started crying to her. My mom told her right then and there, I was like my dad, and all you where gonna do was make yourself miserable if you're upset when they're gone.. make the most of when they are there. We ended up growing apart over other things, and I ended up marrying my fishing buddies ex wife ( cause I knew how she was about me being gone, no secret how she'd take it).

I work 4 days one week, 5 the next, and 6 the next. On my 4 day week, most of the time I leave on thursday night, and come back on sat night to dog train somewhere. My wife would rather me be off and catch up on some sleep than spend 10 hours driving, even if that means Im gone 1 or 2 nights. Then on sunday morning when I get back home, Im fun on sunday afternoon instead of a peepee cause Im exhausted.

if I need to be gone during duck season, i go. She understands. But most of the time if someone has ducks, we have ducks, and I can kill as many an hour from the house as 4 hours from the house.

So You aren't saying how it's going to be you "Honestly saying how it's going to be." That's some funny chit right there. It's the same thing dude. What you are saying is that your relationship with her is not important enough to make any concession for your spouse. This is the way it is so tough chit. No matter what is going on in her life you are going hunting period. Sounds like a plan to me.

It's about give and take and respect. I'm not saying a girl should expect you to give up hunting entirely but by the same token you should respect her enough to make accomodations.

For the guys that have voiced complaints about their women on here......

Write'um down in bold letters, pin'um on the 'fridge...........and let me know how that works for you in a few days.

Your bite isn't near as bad as your bark, I bet.

Anatidae wrote:For the guys that have voiced complaints about their women on here......

Write'um down in bold letters, pin'um on the 'fridge...........and let me know how that works for you in a few days.

Your bite isn't near as bad as your bark, I bet.

True that. Being a keyboard alpha male is a lot different than stomping around their cave carrying their club and beating their chest. Bet all these alpha males are either a bunch of young pups who don't know chit or have more failed relationships than they care to admit.

Like someone said just tell them that is how it is during hunting season from the first one you go through together. And don't ask permission just tell them you're going then leave. If they leave you over hunting I doubt she was the right one for you anyway. Set the bar high the first year. And giving them extra attention during the time you are home helps a lot too.

Give it time...she'll be sick of seeing you around the house in 10 years or so...leaving ain't as much fun when they want you to go

I'm kidding...kind of...my wife is a saint just to put up with me for 12 years....but I get to hunt without much complaining, and she knows if she misses me she's always welcome to go with me.... work makes it tougher to hunt than my wife does....

Been through a bunch of them dating ALWAYS told them if ya can make it thru hunting season then we are good unless you want to go with me.......first and ONLY wife did not like it but dealt with it..but dont have to deal with that anymore....only girl that can keep me from going is a my daughter and most time when i have her( which is every other week) she wants to go with me......dating one now that loves to go so i got it good... hunt close to home and in my own bed at night unless i am at our place in the delta.... when we go there everyone goes..... stick fires ,scotch, good friends and food..... hunting is the bonus when there.......lol

seymore, I think you mighta missed my point.

What typically happens is when a feller is in love, he is with her 7 days a week all year. then come hunting season he is GONE. Shes given up all her friends, all her typical to do stuff, and feels neglected. Its a shock to her system, shes given everything up to be with you, and now in her mind, you've forsaken her. Without trying, you've misled her into thinking how its gonna be, even if all along you told her otherwise. Women need to have their life, and their life with you. So many will give up their life, FOR you. And now you've hurt her because unknowningly you've gotten her to give all that up. Relationships are give and take, but that means something different to a woman than a man. Most all women will give up everything for you, very few men will. Men can go 9 months without seeing their friends, and pick up like they never left off. Women dont do that. Being honest encourage her to have HER life, be that friends, career, school, whatever HER life is, and when she wants you to be a part of it with her do it with as much vigor as you do your stuff. but she still needs HER stuff... women will quit their bunko game, to cook supper for you and be ignored, if you let them. They quit a vacation with their friends, if you let them. Encourage that stuff, and she has a life, something to do when you are gone. We do this to ourselves, we let them do away with all their normal stuff THEY do, and then surprised when they are freaked about hunting season. travis

goosebruce wrote:seymore, I think you mighta missed my point.

What typically happens is when a feller is in love, he is with her 7 days a week all year. then come hunting season he is GONE. Shes given up all her friends, all her typical to do stuff, and feels neglected. Its a shock to her system, shes given everything up to be with you, and now in her mind, you've forsaken her. Without trying, you've misled her into thinking how its gonna be, even if all along you told her otherwise. Women need to have their life, and their life with you. So many will give up their life, FOR you. And now you've hurt her because unknowningly you've gotten her to give all that up. Relationships are give and take, but that means something different to a woman than a man. Most all women will give up everything for you, very few men will. Men can go 9 months without seeing their friends, and pick up like they never left off. Women dont do that. Being honest encourage her to have HER life, be that friends, career, school, whatever HER life is, and when she wants you to be a part of it with her do it with as much vigor as you do your stuff. but she still needs HER stuff... women will quit their bunko game, to cook supper for you and be ignored, if you let them. They quit a vacation with their friends, if you let them. Encourage that stuff, and she has a life, something to do when you are gone. We do this to ourselves, we let them do away with all their normal stuff THEY do, and then surprised when they are freaked about hunting season. travis

That is SO sexy. A straight guy that understands women.